There's been a remarkably cogent whispering campaign around town contending that our coverage has been purposely slanted this way and that. Apparently, it was all about currying favor and lording it over the little guys. The trouble is, they just can't be trusted to remain motionless while we strike our shards against their levees. They'll always find a way to move microscopic pieces of slate into a shelter so the review process can begin in earnest. My wife is at her wit's end trying to beat them into submission. It won't take long for her to become tuckered out and have to get on the next bus back to Ohio, USA. I've been racking my brain to see if I can figure out a way to have her arrested for plunging my temporary household into a veritable minefield of sloth and deception. She just won't let go with the corny jokes already, and I'm sick of it. Pardon me if I seem petty, but I've never noticed that your knees look like old people's faces. Is there a way to block that?
It's when someone on loan from the Getty Museum starts to get under my skin that I begin to wonder out loud at all hours about the effect my hair has on fabricated stewardesses writ large. Some claim not to have ever noticed. Others say that it's all they ever think about. As for me, I'm on the fence and have no intention to get off anytime soon. They say his name is Paul Stumart. He stands about 5'6" and has a trendy coifurette. You wouldn't know it from looking at him, but his Dad was seen one time entering a building. This would have been in the late '90s when such things were all the rage. The thing was, he never had the guts to pull it off without leaking little droplets into the breast pockets of people who never knew any better. When they came to me out of sincere desperation, I could tell that they were given the royal run-around and made into a laughingstock from square one. By dint of my tireless application process, they're now expected to arrive before sundown in a converted lawn cowl of some distinction. But, one thing is very important to understand, to wit: this isn't really very far from where I get my legs done. Which is another way of saying, there won't be a problem.
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