One so fit could have had a place in my plan, if not for a barely noticeable bump midway between her instep and her outer anterior ulna. I had taken her vitals and set up a preening process for her badinage before a panel of sententious expats. They gave her the once-over and made me put her inside a car against both her and my will. I was helpless to stand up to their ulterior pressure tactics. I assume that it was something about the way I smell that gave them license to abrogate our previously altogether mild syntopathy. If you press your ear against the shoulder, sometimes you can barely make out the mating call of an extinct avian species. It may not help anyone's prospective sanitary regimen, but it's a start.
Now that I've entered a program, I feel that all details should be made public for the protection of helpless newcomers to these situations. They may be empowered to ask you to fill in for those whose opt-in clauses are found wanting in a way that renders them fools for self-removal. Their dual-use shenanigans have come to the attention of a pair of brothers who are not to be fucked with, to put it mildly. They poisoned my very family for a tardy water bill, okay? Are you still not ready to 'play ball'? Good. Glad to hear it!
When I hear a lakeside song from one of those self-same newcomers who's the very embodiment of trench warfare survivorhood, I often take it upon myself to approach him or her very quietly and ask just what they think they're doing. If they reply with a noncommittal shrug, I know I've hit paydirt and swiftly induct them into my secret plan. They will be given an immaterial key and requested to cogitate on a series of random digits generated by the Large Hadron Collider. If at any time they feel like backing out, up or over, I won't hesitate to have them sent for an appointment. If they still choose recalcitrance over common sense, I tend to assume a bubbly, if not giddy, mien. Why? Because now, for the first, if not second, time, I know that the tendentious advice I received not more than four years ago has proved its usefulness and I can go my merry way and never look back. This could be a deadly mistake but I'm willing to pay any price, forge any hill and cross any park to ask my precious niece if she'd be able to pick up my dry cleaning the following Wednesday. It wouldn't hurt to ask, is all I'm saying.
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