Everyone stood and I took the opportunity to wonder aloud if the treatment accorded the small-boned and newly nameless family that we were here to memorialize would ever be looked upon as the vile episode that in the end it turned out to be. By alternating small and large-ish steps in a counterclockwise cordon, beyond the handful of Los Angeles' best and broadest, I made my way carelessly to the rear where, fortified with sugar-free gum and ample serveens of licktoast, I jotted my amprimonter, withheld a dip to the hard stop, dropped nothing and wheezed into a boiling room, where, much to my shock and delight I was very much the best dressed denizen in this locale of adumbrated pith.
Where the accent comes from is anyone's guess but caution is advised since one too many catchwords could get you seriously wooed for a doomed mayoral run. If the numbers still refuse to 'add up', then your last best chance at an ounce of relief is to creep willfully yet silently, arch your hindquarters like a desiccated molerat and utter those not-so-famous last words; 'I'll have one too!' When it comes to that, one sorry felon is as good as the next, only this time the gate to a silent tomorrow is one furrow too many to clasp the wing of density.
My decades in the Slurveen Vipperschott have accorded to my presentation a negative gravitas which assures that any somnolent assistants in attendance will endure a modicum of pansified ennui. Not to be outdone by one or another of the trailblazing nincompoops, I bite my lip, step forward and forever hold my withered piece over a flame of house-flavored spandrels. As the hours fly by like so many non-designated periods of duration, it seems that the one and only planet that I have heretofore refused to call 'home' is the fabile detensification facility which greets me with a nod to a pitch of gloom. This can't rattle my game. Why? Because it' s already baked in!
_________________________________
My name is Louis Shriver and I hold myself
utterly blameless for the above account.
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