She confided in her neighbor, an old cuss named Russ Wibbum Jr, about a little wrinkled wisdom mat that she was gifted for service in the Baltimore Chinese Medical Constackulary. It seems that the mat, imprinted with an inspirational slogan, had been mistakenly slipped through a slot in a doorway in one of the surrounding areas and certain self-appointed busybodies were out for revenge. Russ heard her out and then showed her the door. She'd always liked his door, found it comforting in fact. But she really didn't need him to show it to her since she already had several pictures of it on her phone. As you can see, she's a very modern person.
After Russ got clipped while driving through Auburn, NY, he decided that he'd had enough of rehab and signed himself out the next morning. He wasn't sure where to go since his home had already been demolished. He tried phoning his Pastor but the line was busy. Inside the glove compartment and over on the right side there was a small piece of metal. He'd never seen it before. This led him to question his sanity. Also he wondered if foreign actors could somehow be involved. He decided to not be a victim anymore. Now he was ready.
After Russ had lined up some former associates to take the fall, he appeared at my door wearing a Navajo-themed blessing vest. I took him into my den where we both sat comfortably for a few minutes. I offered him a cigarette even though I knew he didn't smoke. This was a test. I stepped out to make a sandwich. When I returned he was sound asleep. I arranged for him to receive an honorary degree. I thought this might get through to him. He wasn't having any, so, when she arrived a half hour later we decided to make it look like an accident. The kind that happens, you know, accidentally. We never heard from him again. I've been told he got a place down in West Virginia and started a ducklet breeding operation. He always had a way with words. I wonder what happened . . ... . . . . . .. .
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